Steve 'Flash' Juon“Young Based God never been no simp
Young Based God fucked yo’ bitch on a blimp
Young Based God tell that girl she a wimp
Young Based God makes a whole lot of sense”
One thing about Lil B that always “made sense” is his massive social media presence. While Brandon Christopher McCartney may not be a major figure to the mainstream, he’s certainly a major figure outside of it thanks to his reach online and a very devoted cult following. He’s also perfected the art of pumping out new albums at a steady clip, ensuring that the hungriest of those followers always stay fed. If I haven’t made it abundantly clear in numerous reviews, let me state it again right here — I have an IMMENSE respect for Lil B’s hustle. He’s long since proven you can be independent and still be a major figure. He raps, he produces, and I wouldn’t be surprised to learn he designs his own No Limit Records style album covers, which are almost always amusing. They’re so golden it makes me think they were sponsored by goldenslot for extra bling.
I wish I could say the same for “Perry Saturn” or “She Ain’t Average” off his latest effort “Bruno Wit Da Pruno.” The former proves his knowledge of seminal ECW/WCW/WWF wrestlers, but just name dropping someone and talking about a German suplex doesn’t do more than that. It would be a more clever song if he talked about his time in The Eliminators, his feuds with Eddie Guerrero and Raven, or talked about submitting people with the Rings of Saturn. It would be a more interesting song if he talked about how Saturn disappeared from public view for half a decade — to the point people genuinely believed he was dead. Simply mentioning a wrestler with no kind of follow up and expecting people to dap you for it is dumb. He could just read the PWI Top 500 to a beat if that’s all it takes (I’m surprised he hasn’t).
“She Ain’t Average” is the bigger transgression though. Only four tracks into an over six hour long album (you read that correctly) Lil B is blatantly shitting the bed on both lyrics and production, and I can’t decide which one is worse. 1:11 into the track his sequencing is so bad that the song audibly skips a beat. Maybe it’s hard to do quality control when you put 100 songs onto an album — maybe that’s also an indication of why you shouldn’t put 100 songs onto an album. “I got so many bitches that I’m doing them a favor.” How does that even make sense? You might be able to Sugar Daddy a few women if you’re incredibly wealthy and they don’t get jealous of each other, but if you’ve got dozens or more there’s not enough of your money or your dick to satisfy them all, even if Roman delivers right to your door.
It’s insulting because the song starts out promising at the beginning, but it quickly becomes evident that his effort is phoned in at all levels. He sure does like talking about his bitches though. “I got 10 bitches, I got 100 bitches, I got bitches coming out the wall […] I got bitches falling from the motherfucking ceiling” quips B on “Take Muhney.” Instinctively you’ll want to analyze it as satire of misogynistic rap artists and try to credit Brandon for making a mockery of such absurd hyper-sexuality. Then you’ll hear a song like “We Just Fuck Em” and realize “Oh shit, he’s serious.” At times it IS funny though just because it’s so repetitive and vapid. “Young Based God still fucking fat bitches/all these hoes on my dick, yeah it’s Christmas.”
Lil B doesn’t need to be the best lyricist alive to succeed. He doesn’t even need to be above average to move units. At this point he’s the assembly line of Based God rap, churning out song after song with little thought put into it. The structure of a Based God song is this — throw on a beat, talk about bitches, talk about getting your dick sucked, talk about the Bay, talk about being a man, and talk about how great you are. You can hit random and on any one of these 100 songs I guarantee you that’s exactly what you’ll get. Look — I’ll prove it right now.
The difference between what Lil B labels a “Freestyle” and what he doesn’t is entirely in his own mind. The songs are the same and the topics are the same. Maybe it indicates he didn’t produce the beat, after all I hear “Drag Rap (Trigger Man)” in there, but it’s no different from the rest. Maybe just one random song isn’t enough to go by though out of 100 — let’s try again.
“Bitches suck my dick cause I’m Hannah Montana.” Now that’s interesting purely from a metaphorical standpoint, because it’s clearly biologically impossible without a strap on, but it’s the same topics and the same bored delivery. You’ve probably seen one of those “AI finishes the song” YouTube videos where an algorithm samples 10-12 seconds of an artist like Queen and then attempts to imitate Freddie Mercury and crew. Sometimes it works and sometimes it doesn’t but it’s often hilarious and occasionally fascinating at how close it gets to being real. I suspect it would have a much easier time learning how to rap like Lil B. Pick the name of a celebrity, wrestler, actor or singer. Compare yourself to them. Make a confusing reference to how much money and sex you get because you are them. There you go. You have a machine that can generate a Lil B album.
Actually Brandon IS the Lil B machine. I have no doubt at all that Brandon is an incredibly clever, incredibly savvy man who realizes that with a minimum amount of effort he can achieve the maximum amount of return on the time he invested in his music. He greases up the wheels now and then with a prolific social media presence that keeps his name active, and then turns on the machine and cranks out song after song until the album rolls off the assembly line ready to ship. That DOES make sense. If you look at Lil B as the ultimate hustler then “Bruno Wit Da Pruno” is his greatest hustle to date. I’m talking about it, people are buying it, the mechanical royalties are pouring in and the Spotify checks keep coming. Good on you B. If it comes that easy, why even try? He’s the epitome of succeeding without trying.