Steve 'Flash' JuonI’d be remiss starting a review of M.C. Shy-D’s “The Comeback” without stopping to clown the cover art. I took graphic design as a requirement of my college degree, and while I confess to being less than great at it then or now, I’m pretty sure I could do better in five minutes with Photoshop. At the very least I would have brightened up the image so you could see Shy-D and his cohort, although ideally I would have taken a better photo at a better angle to begin with. The fonts for the text seem to have been chosen at random, and placing them dead in the center on top of each other only serves to point out how mismatched they are. For that matter why are they centered at the BOTTOM of the photo? Everything about it looks amateur.
“Amateur” is the operative word for this entire album. Shy-D plays up his relationship to Afrika Bambaataa by essentially ripping off the instrumental to “Planet Rock” and then rapping an uptempo, raunchy, 2 Live Crew style rap. “Keep pop, keep popping that thang hoe. Don’t be lame, be true to the game! Work, work that ass.” Ladies, please don’t. If you work as an exotic dancer or a professional stripper, choose any song other than one that exhorts you to “keep slinging that monkey.” If I was anybody involved in the original “Planet Rock” I would have filed a lawsuit over this sample just for how bad this take on it is. “Just work it bitch!” Even 2 Live Crew would disown how misogynistic this is.
On his previous album “Don’t Sweat Me” I was able to to at least partially enjoy how shamelessly Shy-D ripped off other popular rap artists of the day artistically and stylistically. This time that fails because it seems like Shy-D tried to rip off the seixst raps of his former Luke Skyywalker Records labelmates half off the time, then the violent misogyny of certain West coast rappers in ’93, and the combination results in the worst of both worlds on songs like “Back in Decatur.” I might give him one-tenth of a point for representing for an area of metropolitan Atlanta that he’s happy to “be back” in, but he’s shamelessly ripping off MC Ren on “She Swallowed it” to the point I can’t credit anything here at all. I only share the following lyrics to illustrate just how tasteless and crass the song is.
“She said she want to suck my motherfuckin dick
Then I said ‘I’ll be there on the double’
cause me and my dick was out looking for trouble
And when I came it was ready to play
She answered the door with a red negligee
She pulled me in the house real fast
and yanked off my clothes and stuck a tongue in my ass
But I couldn’t take that shit!
I told the bitch ‘Hold up!’ But she wouldn’t fuckin quit
So I just laid back without a frown
and let that hoe keep going Doo Doo Brown
And when she was through, I stick my dick in her mouth
and said ‘I’m glad my mom and dad moved down South’
And when she was through, I told the hoe ‘See you later’
And said to myself ‘I’m glad I’m back in Decatur'”
I’m sure “mom and dad” were really proud that he loves his hometown for that reason. He’s not even proud of the Atlanta metro as a whole here, as he immediately disses other women from the surrounding areas for fronting on him. I’m not sure why they wouldn’t given his attitude, and if you didn’t already know he was ripping off N.W.A his “Fuck Tha Police” song is the very next track entitled “Beware of the Cop-per.” Whoever is doing the Jamaican patois on the chorus needs to stop more than the cop.
The best thing about M.C. Shy-D’s “The Comeback” is that it’s only ten songs long — technically nine if you discount the two different versions of “True to the Game.” I don’t know why he needed a radio version of that song though as no radio programmer or disc jockey would have come anywhere near the song or the album. This might have been the most unnecessary comeback in existence. The album didn’t chart, the singles didn’t chart, Decatur didn’t care, and no one from his former label cared, and I feel reasonably certain saying his cousin Bam didn’t care either or MAYBE he would’ve lent him a helping hand.
Look — I’m not against misogynistic rap or rappers as a rule. I’d probably have to throw out 50% of my collection if I did on principle and that’s not happening. What Shy-D lacks here is the story telling charm of Too $hort, the “I’ll do it for you if you do it for me” fair trade of Akinyele, the high energy sexual frenzy of Luther Campbell, or the ride or die “Gangsta Bitch” pursuits of Apache. He can imitate them all but he’s not close to being good at a single impression he does, which just leaves a tired rapper without an audience who seems to vent his frustration in life by saying “bitch” and “hoe” a lot. The music is better than the lyrics and frankly that’s not saying a lot.